PREMATURE VENTRICULAR CONTRACTIONS

No Strings Attached is a romantic comedy starring Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman as Adam and Emma, two friends who decide to have a “no strings attached” physical relationship. However, this being a rom-com, one of them will start to develop real feelings and it starts throwing the relationship off balance.

Emma Kurtzman: He’s so tall… when he stands next to me, it looks like he’s kidnapping me.

The movie has its funny moments – like how they took off their clothes outside the car before continuing their business back in the car and seeing Natalie Portman trying to tackle Ashton Kutcher. I would think it’s Portman’s most “carefree” role yet – she jumps out from the back of the couch and calls people “bitch”. The height difference between her and Kutcher is hilarious.

Adam Franklin: You can’t fight me, you’re miniature. You fight like a hamster.

The ending is predictable but it’s a break from all the Oscar movies (127 Hours, Black Swan, The King’s Speech, etc). Nothing like a chick flick when you feel that James Franco hallucinates more in 127 Hours than Natalie Portman in Black Swan.

Emma Kurtzman: You look like a pumpkin, bitch!

The only good thing is the Period Mix – how come no one thought of it before? Plus, if Emma is complaining that she’s not getting enough at Westwood Teaching Hospital, may I suggest she switch to Seattle Grace-Mercy West Hospital (location for Grey’s Anatomy) where doctors are good looking and always looking for a good time in the on-call room/supply closet. 3 out of 5 stars.

Adam Franklin: If you miss me, you can’t text, you can’t email, you can’t post it on my Facebook wall. If you really miss me, you come and see me.

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